Hello! Welcome
back Living With
Intention. We’re
pleased you’re turning to us for strategies that will
help you design a wildly fulfilling and remarkably
successful life - on your own terms.
Thanks for sharing this free resource with
others—we appreciate your efforts to spread the word!
I
couldn’t be more thrilled to announce the release of my
new audio program and book, Living
With Intention: Designing
a Wildly Fulfilling and Remarkably Successful Life.
This project has been a labor of love for me and
I’m so excited to have the opportunity to share it with
you. The
program shares over ten years of research-proven and
client-tested strategies to help you design a life you love.
For more information, see Resources
below.
And
by popular request, we’ve extended our 50% off
introductory sale through June 10th, so be
sure to order before then! Oh,
and thanks so much to all of you who have already placed
your orders—we’d love to hear your feedback about how
Living With Intention has impacted your life.
This issue
of Living With
Intention shares a few simple tips for adding more
laughter to your life, as well as some thoughts on the
concept of “false failure.”
And don’t forget to take a look at some of the
great resources designed to enhance your life in meaningful
ways.
Best wishes
for a glorious start to your summer!
Enjoy the journey.
In this week's issue:
Ideas for a Wildly Fulfilling Life...
Laughs
in Strange Places
I
couldn’t make this story up if I tried.
A couple of weeks ago I was plowing through the
stacks of paperwork on my desk when I heard the unmistakable
sound of a kamikaze bee flitting about my office with
apparent disdain for the human race.
Now, due to an unfortunate and rather intimate run in
with a bee when I was about seven years old (I’ll spare
you the details but let’s just say it had Karmic
repercussions for both me and the bee), there’s no love
lost between me and our fine flighted friends.
As such, just the sound of a bee in close quarters
sends me into a rather tense state of being. Even worse, the sight of what can only be described as the
mammoth of all bees convinced me that something needed to be
done before my clients bore witness to how very irrational
and entertaining I can become in situations like these.
So I started to strategize.
My office
has no open windows through which to shoo unwanted visitors,
bees or otherwise, so I decided there were only two options:
To gently encourage my little friend to exit from
whatever route he entered or, well, the alternative wasn’t
pleasant for either him or me.
So I opted for the shooing alternative.
He really seemed to like the light fixtures in my
cathedral ceilings, though, and given my towering 5 foot 4
stature, I wasn’t having much success luring him from the
nosebleed section of my office.
In fact, I’m quite certain I heard him buzz
“nanny nanny boo boo, you can’t catch me” at one
point. So I
decide to get a bit more creative.
I have no ladder or stepstool, no broom to wave him
down with, no magic vacuum wand to brandish in an air of
superiority. I
looked around for anything that might help and suddenly
honed in on the five-foot tall Ficus tree sitting next to my
desk. It’s a
fake one…let me re-phrase here…a lovely silk replica of
real-life foilage…so I’m thinking “it’s light,
it’s long, it’s bee-swatting strong.
Let me at him.”
I grab hold
of the Ficus and start waving it around towards the highest
light fixtures in the place.
Now, I’m sure you’re thinking to yourself “that
bee couldn’t have liked that very much.”
Indeed, you’re right.
He seemed to be ever so slightly agitated.
Ok, maybe more like enraged with venomous anger and
poised to kill. This
incited no less than panic on my part, so I continued the
Ficus-wielding in an attempt to encourage him to leave
peacefully or at least with all major body parts in tact.
Now, I’m blessed to have a lovely office with an
entire wall of picture windows that run from floor to
ceiling and look out onto both a beautiful treed lot and
onto a relatively busy street.
That said, I think you probably know where this story
is headed.
As I’m
doing my best impression of Don Quixote’s
windmill-jousting escapades, I glance out of one of those
huge windows to see several people standing across the
street just taking in the show.
They were entranced by my Ficus-waving interpretive
dance and were wondering, no doubt, when the neighborhood
had begun going downhill.
Now, I consider myself to be a fairly level-headed
professional with a pretty decent reputation in this
community. No
more, my friends. All
of those years of hard work flashed before my eyes as I made
eye contact with each person in that group before gingerly
lowering my Ficus to the ground, smiling ever so sheepishly,
pointing up and mouthing the words “there’s a really big bee up there,” as if this bit of
information would cause them to think “well, now
I understand. You
go right ahead.” They
gave one last look, shook their heads, and continued walking
down the street laughing and offering a running commentary
of the incident. After
the shock of piercing embarrassment subsided a bit, I looked
around and just started to laugh.
And laugh. And
laugh. I mean,
how often do you get that kind of opportunity to stare both
a bloodthirsty bee and the incongruities and silliness of
life right in the face?
I went about my day with a much improved attitude,
full of vitality and humor, sharing the story with anyone
who would listen. And
I was actually able to get through a client appointment with
that same kamikaze bee still cruising around the light
fixture without having a full on anxiety attack.
And now, every time I look at that Ficus I can’t
help but giggle.
That’s
what laughter does for us. From moments of stress and discomfort to times of connection
and possibility, laughter reframes situations enough to help
us get a better perspective to move forward with life in a
more productive and relaxed state.
Laughter does so much for us.
Science has proven that it releases endorphins, the
body’s natural painkillers, and it boosts our immune
function. It
decreases our stress levels, offers shared entertainment,
and actually improves outcomes in work, school, community,
and healthcare settings.
Best of all, it’s free, available 24 hours a day,
requires no prescription, and has no negative side effects. As the old saying goes, laughter truly is the best medicine.
The
unfortunate thing is that, even given all of these benefits,
people aren’t laughing like they could be. There’s an often quoted statistic that says children laugh
on average 400 times per day and adults laugh
on average 15 times
per day. WOW
that’s a sad statistic.
As I always tell my clients, just because we grow old
doesn’t mean we need to grow sullen…or somber…or
jaded. If you
consciously work to lift your laughter quotient a bit every
day, within a couple of weeks you’ll notice marked
improvements in both your attitude and your energy.
Not to mention your ability to deal with the little
hassles of life like unwanted visitors taking up residence
in your light sockets.
So how do
you add more laughter into your days?
Here are a few tips to get you started:
1) Create your own “Laughing Stock” of stories, cartoons, jokes, memories, or anything else that brings a smile to your face and a chuckle to your day. Keep laugh-launchers readily available at work, home, in the car, or even in your mind. Simply remembering a funny story has just as powerful an effect on your physical and emotional health as experiencing it the first time.
One of my favorite guaranteed giggles comes from remembering the story of the time my husband and traveled to visit our daughter and son-in law in another city. They were newlyweds so, as with most young couples, our guest bed was an air mattress with a very slow leak in an extremely small room. In fact, we had to take turns going into the room because we couldn’t both fit in there upright at the same time.
Now, my husband is a rather big dude and in such close quarters he managed to smash his elbow on the “jutting out” portion of some piece of furniture and began writhing in pain at the other end of the mattress. Compassionate wife that I am, I immediately knelt on the air mattress to comfort him and offer an ice pack. Remember, though, that the air mattress has a slow leak. So, when I displaced the remaining air by kneeling on the mattress so quickly, it effectively catapulted him off the other end at full force directly into the wall behind him, resulting in a concussion or something closely resembling one.
After a three-second check in to make sure that I hadn’t broken his neck, we both shared an earth-shattering laughing fit. It took us longer to recover from the laughter than it did for him to recover from both the arm and head injury.
Note to readers: do not attempt this particular stunt at home. Because it hurt. A lot. Even
so whenever we recall this story, we can’t help but laugh again and it immediately improves whatever situation we’re in. Keep those stories, silly activities, movies, websites, and anecdotes handy. Use them well and as often as needed.
2) Have a “Don’t Laugh” contest with someone.
One sure-fire way to spark shared laughter is to actively try not to laugh. This technique is especially fun with kids, friends, and spouses. Sit in front of your opponent and take turns starting the game. The goal is to hold a straight face—preferably a very neutral, “nothing phases me, I’m apathetic and proud of it” look for as long as possible. Stare each other directly in the eye until someone breaks. Get the laughter only slightly under control and try again. Speed counts and makes the game far more ruthless. It’s guaranteed to get you giggling nonstop for at least ten or twenty minutes.
3) When you’re really stressed, fake yourself out.
Basically, this means to force yourself to laugh. I know this sounds impossible, but research has proven that the simple act of genuinely smiling or forcing a really loud belly laugh can immediately reduce stress hormones in the system and relax both the body and the mind. Even if it doesn’t feel genuine, it will before long. Just try it and you’ll see. A full minute or two of authentic smiling or laughter will change everything about your outlook and your sense of well being.
So look for
those subtle and not so subtle ways to spark more laughter
in your life. There
are more funny bone ticklers out there than you might
guess—you just need to look for them and use them.
I certainly didn’t anticipate that a five-foot
Ficus or a husband-launching episode would be long-term
stress reducers for me, but they are. What will be on your list?
Ideas for A Remarkably Successful Life...
False
Failures
I’ve been
on this major bandwagon lately about the concept of
“perceived failure” and the profound impact it can have
on our life satisfaction.
So many people avoid trying something new or even
trying something again because they’re afraid of a
negative outcome—they’re fearful of looking stupid, not
being good enough, or failing to achieve the exact results
they’re after. I call this the phenomenon of “false failure.”
That’s
because “failure” in its most objective sense is simply
a matter of perspective—it’s really all about finding
out what didn’t work this time so you know what you can do
differently next time.
And trust me…it’s the “next time” that makes
the difference
in achieving what
you want. The most successful people in the world have made repeated,
sometimes exhaustive efforts to get to where they want to
go.
It's their persistence and their perspective that ultimately
leads to their accomplishments.
So the next
time your fear of failure seems to be holding you back,
consider what the world would look like if the following
people had seen their early attempts as “failures”
rather than learning experiences:
- Michael Jordan was cut
from his high school basketball team
- Herman Melville sold only
eleven copies of Moby
Dick during his lifetime
- The world’s best batters
miss nearly 70% of the pitches thrown to them
- Thomas Edison had over
two-thousand “failures” in the process of inventing
the incandescent light bulb
- Abraham Lincoln
“failed” at nearly everything (from business to
elected office to finance) before he finally led our
country during one of the most tumultuous times in
history
- Henry Ford filed
bankruptcy several times before he built his empire and
his fortune
A
Chinese proverb reads “fall down seven times, get up
eight.” That’s
the mark of a truly successful person.
What distinguishes the winners from their less
successful counterparts is their willingness to get up that
one last time. So
when the time comes…get up, by all means, and get to it!
|
Resources That Will Change Your Life
Living
With Intention Audio Program and Book
There’s an art and a science to
living deliberately. Living
With Intention comes from exploring your priorities and
passions and capitalizing on your skills and gifts.
Yet busy lives and competing commitments can make it tough
to spend time and energy to reflect on what’s really
important to you and what you want to do next.
Living
With Intention offers a proven solution to help you make
purposeful life choices and find meaning in all you do.
Using a unique combination of information, inspiration, and
reflection, this audio program will guide you in creating a
vision for who you want to be and how you want to design
your life.
Volume
One shares three critical foundations for designing a
wildly fulfilling and remarkably successful life:
- Disk
One, Powerful Perspectives, focuses on creating an
attitude of possibility and opportunity using simple
ways to reframe your thinking and your life.
- Disk
Two, Get Vivid, Get Busy, and Get Support, details
the best strategies for building a vision and
complementary goals that ensure your fulfillment and
success.
- Disk
Three, Energy, Focus, Outcomes, highlights practical
ways to direct your time, energy, and expertise to
achieve outstanding results.
- Disk
Four, Worksheets and Reminders, offers a host of
great resources for putting your new-found knowledge
into action.
Volume
Two continues with three additional fundamentals for
creating a life of meaning and purpose:
- Disk
One, What You Do Best, covers proven approaches for
identifying your unique strengths and gifts, along with
the best ways to use them to create the life you want.
- Disk
Two, Enduring Happiness, shares the most researched
techniques for weaving more joy and contentment into
your days and your life.
- Disk
Three, From Stress to Success, explores how to tap
into the power of positive stress while minimizing the
impact of negative stress through research-based
practices.
- Disk
Four, Worksheets and Reminders, provides another set
of outstanding resources for translating ideas into
results.
Living
With Intention Book
The softcover book integrates all
of this great information in one easy to read, simple to
navigate resource.
Order
By June 10TH
And
Save^Up^To 50%!
Package
#1, SAVE 40% - SALE
PRICE $29.00 plus shipping
Living
With Intention Volume One.
A four-disk set that includes three audio cds and one
“Worksheets and Reminders” cd in e-book form.
This sale gives you a 40% savings off the regular
price of $49.00.
Package
#2, SAVE 50% & receive FREE shipping on Volume
Two—SALE PRICE $56.00 plus
shipping
Living
With Intention Volume One and Volume Two, as well as the
Living With Intention book.
You will receive Volume One (four disk set)
immediately. Volume
Two (four disk set) and the accompanying book will ship FREE
upon their release in July, 2005.
This sale gives you a 50% savings off the
regular price of $112.95 and includes FREE shipping for
Volume Two and the book.
Four
ways to order:
*Order
Online | here
*Fax: 509.533.1966
*Phone: 509.532.1600
*Mail: 104 S.
Freya Street, Turquoise #226-B,
Spokane, WA 99202
*For fax,
phone, and mail orders, go
here to download a PDF order
form. |
Women Making a Difference...
Ideas
to Help You Thrive
I can’t
say enough good things about this month’s resource to help
women thrive. I
am now a big fan and raving supporter of Imagine
Magazine,
an independent publication making a difference for
individuals, communities, and the world.
I can’t get enough of this quarterly publication.
Its goal is to help people create a meaningful life
and I am constantly amazed by the high quality and variety
of articles that impact almost every facet of a vibrant,
healthy, and fulfilling life.
Just to give you an idea on their philosophy,
here’s an excerpt from their website:
“If
this were the last day of your life, would you say that you
had lived it well? If there were some great cosmic ledger
sheet keeping tabs on what you had made of your particular
gifts, would the record show you had used your time and
talents wisely?
‘It's never too late to be what you might have been,’
said George Eliot. Well, maybe. But each mortal life also
comes with an expiration date attached to it. None of us
actually knows the specific date, but it's a safe bet that
for many of us, it's later than we think. Later, but not too
late — as long as we start now.
Starting now is what Imagine is all about. It's about
imagining the possibilities of your life and creating, from
the inside out, a life of meaning, substance and joy.”
So, I
encourage all of my readers to start imagining your
possibilities today. For
more information about Imagine Magazine or to subscribe, log
on to www.imaginemagazine.net.
Cheers and
see you next month!
All the best,
Copyright © 2004 all rights
reserved.
Published by Deanna Davis,
PhD, co-owner of Applied
Insight. Deanna is a life and business
coach, professional speaker and writer who helps people
design wildly fulfilling and remarkably successful lives -
on their own terms. Deanna is an admitted laughaholic and a
strong proponent of adding chocolate as a key component of
the USDA Food Pyramid. For information about her
professional speaking and coaching services, contact Deanna
at
deanna@appliedinsight.net
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You
may freely distribute the articles in this newsletter as
long as they are carry the following notice: Copyright 2005
Deanna Davis, PhD, www.appliedinsight.net.
Applied
Insight
104 S. Freya St., Turquoise Flag Building #226-B
Spokane, Washington 99202
|
